My Social Media Time Out

Wrapping up a 9-month break from the blog’s Facebook page. As someone who likes to write and share that may seem counter intuitive. However, it has been refreshing, taught me a lot, and built confidence. Let me explain:

The Why

For the last couple years, I’ve chosen a word to focus on. I reflect on how it affects me, what work I need to do, what the Bible says about it, etc.

When deciding upon a word for 2019, humility kept popping up. At first there was confusion, not because I was perfect in that area of life, I just didn’t feel I was overly conceited or proud (and yes, I realize saying that doesn’t help!).

After thinking about and praying on it for a while; it became clear there were some areas in my life I needed to be humbler. One area took precedence.  

Social Media

I’ve never been one to spend lots of time editing posts or photos. Authenticity is more important. However, I started to realize how much value I placed on my posts, and more frighteningly myself as a person, was regulated by how many “likes”, “shares”, and “comments” my posts received.

I also felt discouraged when I didn’t have time to do more. The constant notifications like “You haven’t posted anything in a while”, “Boost your post to reach more people”, and “0 new likes this week/month/year” wore me down.

It made me feel like less, cultivated an attitude of unhappiness, and made me jealous of others who were able to do what I wanted to do. Not long after the comparison game started.

All because my head perceived the information, stories, and ideas I had to share as “big and noteworthy” and I was let down when response was minimal or nonexistent.

Then there was the temptation to set aside other things in life so I could accomplish more for the blog. It was a fast sinking ship!

The Reality

My confidence and how I perceive myself should only come from one person, God. People change from day to day, some choose to only portray the very best part of them, some ignore important things and people in the name of getting something done, and different people are gifted with different things.

I vacillated with the ideas of shutting down the blog and/or cancelling social media for a couple months. My head said I could “work through” the humility issues and keep it up just fine. My heart knew I would need a complete break.

And so, April of last year I cancelled my social media page for the blog. It was difficult. A part of me felt missing. I wondered if I was doing the right thing. I felt cranky at times because I wasn’t using my creative outlet. It was like this part of my life would be blank.

As time went on and life became busier with selling and buying a home and starting to homeschool our kindergartener, it just kind of fell to the wayside. Occasionally, I would think about starting it up again, but than thoughts of “ratings” popped up, and no matter how small they were, I knew it meant I wasn’t truly ready yet.

In the fall, I did write a few posts and shared them with friends and family. Some issues and things felt too important to not share.

A while after those posts, it hit me I felt differently about them. Sure, I looked at comments, but it stopped there. No lingering judgement, comparison, or fretting.

Then came the notification my 3-year hosting contract was about to expire. Holy smokes how did that go by already! Now it felt like do or die time. Should I keep blogging or should I put this chapter to rest?

Praying, searching my heart, and speaking with confidants was turned up a notch. A few thoughts came to rest in my mind and it’s what I’ll carry with me as I continue this journey.

~ It’s not bad to share thoughts, emotions, stories, information, etc. What is bad, is depending on some kind of return from it. I should be writing for myself and nothing/no one else.

~ God created me with the desire to be creative, to write, to want to share. To ignore how he designed me is not honoring or giving glory to Him.

~ When there is something I struggle with/can’t do on my own (i.e. be content with writing for myself and not for praise) it’s ok – as long as I’m honest about it and seeking help from the only One who can right my heart and mind, again!

~ Keeping focused on my relationship with God and family will always be more important than blogging.  As this has taken more of a front line, a greater sense of fulfillment has naturally filled my heart and eradicated the previous need for acceptance from social media.

Looking forward to a great year of continued growth. As our family made a move last year there’s lots to catch up on and we can’t wait to share it with you via the website, Facebook, or Instagram!