Why We Should be Careful with Our Words

Have you ever felt proud of yourself for holding in a tirade of mean words when all you really wanted to do was spew them all over the place?

I’ve been there a time or two… or three…

It can be especially difficult when our emotions are validated due to hurtful behavior leaving damage in its wake.

I think that’s why these words from Corrie Ten Boom’s book, “The Hiding Place”, stood out so much.

Earlier that week, she learned the name and identity of a man who betrayed underground workers and contributed to her being at Ravensbruck.

The underground group was a network of people Corrie played a integral role in, that helped Jews hide and escape during World War II. Ravensbruck was a concentration “death” camp for women. The man was someone she thought was trustworthy.

Corrie relayed how her anger simmered until it was a “burden of rage”. One night, while laying crunched between two other women, in cold barracks, with a thin blanket, she finally asked her sister Betsie why she didn’t seem bothered by the news of betrayal.

Betsie replied, “I’ve felt for him ever since I knew – and pray for him whenever his name comes into my mind. How dreadfully he must be suffering!”

As Corrie laid awake for a long time after that she thought, “Wasn’t she trying to tell me in her own gentle way that I was as guilty as [him]? Didn’t he and I stand together before an all-seeing God convicted of the same sin of murder? For I had murdered him with my heart and with my tongue.”

Hurtful Words Equals Murder

I don’t know about you, but I’ve never equated hurtful words from my mouth or in my mind and heart to murder. But as I paused to think, I found it rung true.

And the Bible has a lot to say about it!

The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit. Proverbs 15:4

Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Proverbs 16:24

The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Proverbs 18:21

A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. Luke 6:45

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29

But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. Matthew 12:26

Thankfully, God’s Word provides guidance on how we curb the negative thoughts swirling in our hearts and hurtful words brimming on our lips.

In 2 Corinthians 10:5, the apostle Paul reminds us,

“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” NIV

Take every thought captive! If you struggle with that like I do, try one of these:

1. Usher a short “Lord, Help!” prayer. He sees and hears, and doesn’t require long and glamorous to step into action.
2. Work on memorizing Philippians 4:8 which says, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

Heavenly Father, Sometimes it’s really hard to swallow the words rising up and throw away the thoughts tumbling around. When we get hurt, please meet us where we’re at and provide a sense of peace that surpasses all understanding. Heal our traumas that trigger unhealthy reactions. Help us to look at our offenders the same way you do – as a child of God – loved and forgiven for every single sin. May our hearts and minds grow to be centered on You, so we can reflect your light to those around us. Amen.